LAUREN Goodger has spoken of her heartache as she marked the two-year anniversary since the death of her baby daughter, Lorena.
The TOWIE star’s second child just minutes after childbirth in 2022, despite having enjoyed an uncomplicated pregnancy.
The-37 year-old also has a three year old daughter Larose but has spoken candidly of the deep pain she has experienced in the wake of her daughter’s tragic and unexpected death.
Taking to her Instagram stories this week, she opened up about the extent of her grief. She said: “I am so burnt out, what a hard week of emotions, grief, pain, loss fear, worry, confusion and unfairness.”
And Lauren also described sleepless tights and panic attacks as she relived the traumatic events of two years ago.
She said: “Ive hardly slept all week. But today is a new day, no more tears or nightmares, no more panic attacks. The most important day Monday for my daughters anniversary was ruined by a lot of other things going on. But I am still standing for my baby girl. Life is hard and I am going to be very positive and posting the positive things otherwise I won’t move forward mentally.”
The mother-of-two may be referring to her disappointment earlier this week, as a few of her friends failed to reach out to her support her, as she dismissed them as ‘fake.’
Earlier this week she took to social media criticising not only her friends, but also her family for blanking her on such an important day.
She said: “Some of you are family and some of you are friends, but really you are not genuine family or friends. I will only tolerate you for Larose sake, but when shes older she will make her own judgement.”
The hurt reality star then went on to issue a stark karmic warning to the flakes in her life.
She said: “Lorena is watching over all of you and if you make zero effort and fail to drop me a message, shame on you because you’ve let Lorena down also.”
Lauren previously called Lorena's death the most "traumatic experience of my life".
Speaking from her home in Essex in 2022, she told The Sun: “I went into hospital thinking I would come home with a baby girl but I came home with nothing.
“Lorena was a healthy baby and it was a textbook pregnancy.
“Lorena should be here with me. I held her and she looked like she was sleeping. I thought she would wake up.
“This has been the most traumatic experience of my life."
Earlier this year she had a scary A&E dash with Larose after her daughter fell ill with a virus.
Lauren admitted losing Lorena has made her more anxious when her eldest is ill, leaving her "constantly fearing the worst".